.:[4/4] Best of Wives, Best of Women - DoW:.

It had been nearly a moon since her talk with Voltagewish, and he still hadn’t returned to her with an acceptance of her proposition, or even a loyal decline – and because of such, she was left with false hopes that he’d decide not to move on. It was unkind and horrible and just purely selfish, but if she let herself believe that what they had was truly over, she’d be nothing more than an empty shell; silent and completely hollow.

In short, she wasn’t doing well in the slightest. It seemed her encounter with Lightningbolt – Voltagewish’s damn mother – in StarClan, alongside the second mass exodus of all six clans, wasn’t doing her much good, either. She was well and truly broken.

The she-cat noticed a jovial Shalestep finishing a patrol with a group of HighClan cats, seemingly glad to be around more familiar faces in the camp. She scanned the area for someone – likely to talk to – and flashed a knowing smile when she spotted Daisymask. Shalestep padded over to her friend, prodding the mopey she-cat’s shoulder with her paw. “You look a bit run down today. Are you okay?”

The younger cat jumped a little at the sound of her friend’s voice, having been unsuspecting the cheerful undertone it displayed despite the heaviness of the words. She tried her hardest to muster up a laugh, a smile, an anything in return but she couldn’t do it. Instead, upon meeting Shalestep's caring gaze, Daisy burst into tears.

Shalestep quickly folded her ears back and rushed to fawn over the she. Apparently, as it seems, the answer is that she is very not okay, Shale thought to herself as she crouched down next to Daisymask.

“Oh no, dear… come on, let it out.” Shalestep pressed her shoulder into her friend’s side for comfort – it was times like this she wished for a tail to better convey that she wanted to help. Even if she didn't know the full weight behind Daisy’s overflowing emotion, she must have needed to cry so she waited while her friend let her tears free for a bit. “Whenever you’re ready to talk, just let me know. I'm not movin’ until you ask me to,” she mewed softly.

As her body started to shiver and breathing became shaky, Daisymask looked up to see passers-by looking her over with concerned glances. Normally she would be overly embarrassed at being such a wreck in the midst of any clan, but her friend's soothing voice and calming warmth pressed to her side made her lose all her worries. She took a couple of deep breaths, nearly hiccuping in the process, and murmured tearily, “It’s… it’s still Volty. I just… I can’t…”

Shale listened as her friend started to slowly calm down a little. She flicked her ears at the few eavesdropping cats to shoo them away and focused in on what Daisy was starting to say. When she first heard about their fight a couple of weeks ago, she was surprised that the two had it in them; she had never even considered it a possibility in fiction, let alone reality. Ever the fixer, Shale tried to coax more of the story out of her friend. “I should’ve asked when you first told me. Was he angry that you left, or were you upset that you frightened him with you being away? What… what happened, exactly?”

The she-cat sniffed. "I... I don't really know." She choked back on tears that were beginning to resurface, refusing to make Shalestep watch her go around in another batch of tears until after she'd explained the situation fully. She took a deep breath and hiccupped, “He said he wasn't mad, just... scared. But I don't know, I'm terrible at reading cats' emotions and I feel he was... just saying that so I wouldn't freak out more, you know?”

She rested her chin against her paws once again, soon moving them so she could bury her face. “Maybe I screwed up, but I stand by what I said. I don't deserve him; he could do so much better with another she-cat. He doesn't need me at all.”

Shalestep stared in disbelief at her friend. “What the ever-loving StarClan do you mean you don't deserve him!?” she questioned. “Why would you feel like that, Daisy? You deserve him more than any other cat here, because he loves you!” She huffed a bit in an attempt to calm down – her friend was already hurting, and though she felt it might knock some sense into her she certainly wasn’t going to start yelling. “Regardless, I'm sure he was scared because you left, that’s all. I was worried as well, especially with all the two-leg activity, but you’re safe. I'm sure he is just as happy as I am, probably more so, to have you back.” She sighed. “Of course Voltagewish needs you, mousebrain. You haven't been here as long as I have to see all that he has lost. I don't think he could stand to lose you too.”

Daisy's ears flattened at Shale’s tone and she looked to the side with chagrin. Her cheeks were burning, her eyes red and stinging. Oh StarClan, not again. She couldn't lose Shalestep too.

“I don't deserve him in the slightest,” she whispered, her voice wobbly. “Shalestep, I can’t give him the family he both wants and needs. I... I left camp to say goodbye to my brother, and he... he told me...” She gulped, taking a few moments to calm herself again. “I'm infertile, Shale. I... I can't have kits, ever. And while it's hurting me, I'm nearly certain it's wounding Volty more.”

For once Shalestep wasn't sure what to say to comfort her friend, so instead settled for leaning into her more. She had never really thought about kits, at least not yet… but, still, finding out she couldn't have any would be crushing. “I'm sorry, Daisymask,” she mewed softly. “That… that is sad news.” She twitched her whiskers in thought.

“You still deserve Voltagewish though, because I know he still loves you – and more importantly, you still love him.” She paused, allowing herself to think for a second. “Because, well… if you didn't, then this wouldn't hurt nearly as much.” She laughed, continuing, “I'm sorry, I’m not making fun but it stinks, and it hurts, but that's how love works, I think. Maybe there is a solution that we can find together?” While she doubted the possibility, especially for something of this magnitude, she was still willing to try.

“It... It's not your fault, Shale,” Daisymask whispered, wiping her teary cheeks on her shoulder. By the end of the week her fur would surely be matted something disgusting with the flood of salty tears she'd been spreading through it. “You don't need to be sorry; there's nothing you could've done about it.”

She shrugged lightly, near invisibly, and replied, “I appreciate the thought, Shale, I really do. But I don't think there's anything that can be done. I know he loves me and I sure hope he knows the feeling is reciprocated, but I simply can't make him suffer this for my sake. He doesn't deserve anything but happiness.”

Shale sat with her friend quietly trying to figure out what more to say. Her eyes scanned the area trying to find Voltagewish, even if Daisymask wouldn't believe it Shale knew that Voltage wouldn't care about the kits. She just wished there was some magic solution that would fix it all. “I really wish there was something I could say to make you feel better, honest. I don't know how to help yet, but there has to be a solution, we’re just not thinking of it yet.” She cuddled closer to her friend and gave her a few quick licks to the top of her head to try and calm her down. “He won't suffer; he will be happy, and with you. That's all that matters, isn't it?”

Meanwhile Voltagewish, having not heard a word of the two she-cats' conversation, was sitting by himself at the entrance to the warrior's den, his face unseen as his gaze was focused on his paws. He seemed to be thinking, and doing quite a lot of it; what it was about, he wasn't exactly willing to tell anyone. His head was low and his tail was half-curled around his paws. He felt... tired. He didn't know why, but he just felt exhausted, and sad, and... tired.

He wanted to talk to Daisymask. That was the one thing he wanted right now. But he knew he couldn't; he didn't want to make things worse... She'd told him to just find another cat to love, but he knew, he knew he couldn't do that.

“...Daisy...” He whispered to his paws, a pang of sadness reverberating through his frame as he spoke his love's name. “...I'm... I’m sorry.”

The she-cat in question’s lower lip wobbled, then opened to her shaky breathing, and before she knew it she was sobbing again. Worse than she thought she had ever experienced; StarClan, Shalestep was good to her, but she just didn't understand. And of course, Daisy forgave her for that; of course Shale wouldn't have ever felt what she was. She hoped no cat ever did. And she was just so, so patient – still cuddling up to her despite the torrential waterfall mess escaping her eyes. She didn't deserve Shale. Didn't deserve Volty, didn't deserve anyone, and yet somehow, despite all odds, they loved her anyhow.

As she calmed, her ears twitched. She could have sworn she'd heard her name being whispered, muttered, StarClan knew what. But she pushed the thought aside to whisper, mutter, StarClan knew what, a small thankyou to her friend.

After another minute or two of looking at his own paws, Voltagewish raised his gaze and slowly looked around camp, ears twitching slightly as he listened for any signs that someone had seen him. His eyes widened at the sight of two familiar pelts of fur; a white and orange blob was sitting with a slightly larger, darkish-brown red blob, and he immediately felt a twinge of fear – StarClan, he thought. I hadn’t realised they were so close… Gods above, I hope they didn’t hear me.

And as though the universe wanted to prove otherwise, Shalestep’s ears swivelled, thinking she heard a familiar whisper, but between her own thoughts and her friend’s crying she couldn't be sure and turned her attention back. She felt like there was nothing she could do to help but just be there for Daisymask, and she wished that Voltagewish would pop up someplace so she could call him over to sort this out. She didn't think he was in much better shape than Daisymask, but maybe he could talk some sense into her. So while she prayed for his appearance, she cooed gently to her distressed clanmate, calming her as best she could.

Voltagewish's heart seemed to stop when he saw the crystal-blue gaze of Shalestep lock onto his mate’s for just a moment, and his eyes went wide with terror. Gods, they’re probably plotting against me-- He stopped himself mid-thought as he witnessed the brown she-cat clearly consoling his mate and he sighed in relief, his line of sight falling back to his paws. Despite avoiding thinking too much over the topic, his heart settled on the decision that he would at least try and apologize to his mate. He didn't blame her in the slightest for anything; only himself. His paws felt like lead as he took a few steps forward, slowly heading over towards the pair of she-cats.

Daisymask's eyes flicked up at the sudden movement of brown peeking at the edge of her vision. Her tear-clouded sight wasn't clear enough to differentiate the cat's pelt from that of Voltagewish, but she had a pretty strong sense that she knew who exactly it was padding towards the couple of she-friends. And StarClan, no no no no no she would have none of that.

Her fur bristled as her eyes began to lose their sting and saltiness. She shook her head in denial, refusing to look back to her mate as she stood, backing away at a quicker pace than Voltagewish was advancing. Or, well, she would have, had Shalestep not been sitting by her. This wouldn't seem like an appropriate response to her friend; so she stayed put on the ground, paws turned in, head hanging low and hiding her cheeks that burnt with embarrassment. There was nothing she could do but breathe until he arrived.

Shalestep turned with her when she realized that someone was coming over. She was ready to glare a warning at whoever was approaching and send them away, but she changed her expression to a gentler, more anxious one when she saw it was a clearly distraught Voltagewish. Without even looking to her small frame, Shalestep could still sense Daisymask’s unease. She nodded to Voltagewish, not sure what to say but hoping he would somehow try and fix the situation despite his own apparent hurt.

The tom stopped short a little ways away from the two she-cats, his heart pounding out of his chest. He noted with some small comfort that he had Shalestep’s approval, and slowly but surely took a few steps towards Shalestep and sat down beside her, eyeing his mate nervously across the brown female body separating them.

“Daisy, please, I... I'm not mad,” he began, his voice barely a whisper. “I... I'm sorry if I made you scared.”

It didn't matter his intentions - every bone in Daisy's body was screaming for her to escape the oncoming situation as quickly as she could. She knew he wouldn't harm her, no, not at all; she was simply just filled with so much guilt that she was having troubles processing anything logically. She kept her head ducked down as Voltagewish spoke, shuffling herself closer to Shalestep. She took a couple of deep breaths before warily lifting her teary eyes to scan the rocks across the clearing – a braver cat would’ve met the heterochromic ones of her mate, but she felt no courage.

Shalestep licked her friends shoulder for support and gave a small nod to Voltagewish, hoping it would show her approval in his actions.

Voltagewish could feel his mate's gaze burning into his skin, shaking him right down to his bones. Swallowing his pride, he looked her over. StarClan, she looks miserable, he thought to himself, biting his lip for a moment as a tear of his own rolled down his face.

“Daisy,” he started again, a shakiness to his voice. “I... I am so, so sorry for scaring you like that.”

Daisy's heart pounded heavily in her chest, very nearly drowning out Voltagewish's words. She took a deep breath, calming herself as Shale's coarse tongue raked gently over her shoulder. Daisy shot her friend a thankful smile before returning her gaze to her mate. She wasn't nearly as teary as she was expecting to be, instead more nervous for the conversations to come.

Yet somehow, somehow, she took her small speck courage into her paws and said against her throbbing heartbeat a small, quiet, yet unwavering, “Voltagewish. I'm so sorry. I... I shouldn't have said anything, and... well...” She swallowed hard, her voice turning meek again. “And I love you. I could never stop, even if I tried.”

Voltagewish noticed Daisymask meeting his yellow-green gaze with her own, and a spark of hope glinted in his eyes for a moment; only a moment. He let her speak, then the dark tom felt his chest swell with love, and Voltagewish found himself holding back tears as his ears lowered in sympathy. “I feel the same way,” he found himself saying, a small smile crossing his face. “I... I don't think I can ever stop loving you. And, y’know, you can tell me anything,” he continued, his sadness making itself known as he lowered his head, tears rolling down his face despite the smile across it.

In all honesty, Daisy wasn't sure what to expect, and because of such hadn't really worked on a reply – but this, this feeling of lightness and happiness and forgiveness didn't really warrant a reply, did it? It mostly spoke for itself, but for the other words left unspoken and untouched, the warrior let herself move around the she-cat dividing the star-crossed-lovers in order to embrace her mate.

Shalestep couldn't help but feel a little prickle of a tear begin to blur her vision. She was glad both her friends were talking it out, plus she could feel Daisymask relax, finally knowing her mate loved her no matter what. She stood up when Daisy went to meet Voltagewish and took a pace back, sitting down to give them some room, not wanting to go too far should she be needed once again. You guys were meant for each other, no matter the challenges, she thought to herself as she wiped her face a few times with her paw.

Voltagewish's eyes widened in surprise when Daisymask moved forward and pressed herself against him. She didn't say a word to him, she just... embraced him. For a moment, his gaze rose to a distancing Shalestep, glowing with a warm gratitude that spelled out his thanks, before pressing his face lightly into Daisymask's shoulder, feeling a wave of tranquillity wash over him. Thank you for understanding, he seemed to be saying, the small smile spread back across his face.

It wasn't perfect, and it never would be, and there was still a lot to discuss and work out and work through, but for now they were content.

And isn’t that what really matters?